Local 4′s ‘Police Chief of the Refrigerator’ shares top 12 office fridge etiquette rules

Let me start with a confession, I have always been a rule-follower and a bit of a perfectionist. I pride myself on being a good citizen.

I return shopping carts to the “cart corral,” I don’t throw trash on the side of the road, I used to religiously return library books on time, and I was always kind enough to rewind my video rentals.

So, when our newsroom was remodeled to include a bigger, better community refrigerator, I naively concluded we would all work together to keep it clean, somewhat organized, and leave room for just about everyone to store their meals for a few hours. If you’ve ever used a community refrigerator, you have probably already guessed, I was doomed to disappointment.

I didn’t set out to be the Police Chief of the Refrigerator. No one asked me to take the job. There was no election. Instead, I was forced to seize power when I noticed a strange and unpleasant odor coming from the fridge one day as I opened the door to store my Tupperware container of chicken and rice.

How could this be, I thought? What’s this smell? How could a refrigerator shared by apparently responsible, professional adults suddenly leave me gagging when I opened the door?

For the first time, but sadly not the last, I found a plastic bag with slimy, moldy leftovers that looked like part of a high school experiment on the middle shelf.

Who could have left something in there long enough to rot? Did no one else see this menace to cleanliness and good health? In a cleaning frenzy, I started checking expirations dates, giving mysterious bags a sniff test, and grabbed Lysol wipes to wash down the shelves.

Once I was done, I sent a mass email to my co-workers. Surely, once they were notified about this glaring breach of fridge etiquette, the problem would be solved. The culprit would be remorseful and others would be on notice that leaving foot to rot is very bad form and our fridge would be safe for everyone to store the meals we need to bring to work as part of our busy lives. Alas, once again I was doomed to disappointment.

So, it began.

Since then, I have found a handful of moldy leftovers, food items with expiration dates two years past, empty dirty dishes stored in the fridge, carryout containers that are not sealed, leaking, and left for more than a week, and (oddly) an Alan Jackson CD (?). It’s still there, by the way.

I am now reaching out to all the people who never clean the fridge and smile in amusement when they see me checking, smelling, tossing, and wiping down the shelves. I ask...

• Are you really so busy and overwhelmed that you can’t remember the Styrofoam dish filled with half-eaten tacos you left in the fridge for five days?
• Do you truly think it’s cool to leave salad dressing, yogurt, and jugs of orange juice for months at a time?
• Have you never smelled the rotting food?
• Do you care about cleanliness and good health at all?

My top 12 refrigerator etiquette rules

1. Group Refrigerators are designed to hold one meal for a few hours, cook it, eat it, and take your dishes home.
2. Please use containers that are fully-sealed and clean.
3. If you want to leave condiments in the fridge, I think it’s OK, but then finish them in a timely manner or remove them by the time they expire.
4. If you leave condiments for long, someone else may “borrow” them. I vote that’s fine, but never, ever use the last drop of the ketchup, salad dressing, or BBQ sauce- leaving the true owner without that item when they really need it.
5. Avoid putting your whole lunch box in the fridge. It takes up too much space. Not cool.
6. Avoid using plastic grocery bags to store a bunch of badly-stored individual perishable items. I would say 90% of the moldy items I find are in mysterious plastic bags.
7. Don’t forget the food you leave behind. I don’t care if you have to write yourself a note, put a reminder in your phone, or tattoo it on your forehead. When you leave a half-eaten salad in a barely closed plastic container, the limit should be 24 hours, maybe 48 but that’s it.
8. If you find you have a problem forgetting food, put your name on the container and take ownership when someone asks why it’s been there for two weeks.
9. Do not leave half-drank drinks in the community refrigerator for days at a time. The space may be needed for someone else’s food.
10. When there’s a group meal with leftovers, it’s nice to wrap them and leave them for other people, BUT, if you leave them, send a note to everyone letting them know the leftovers exist. They’re more likely to be enjoyed that way. No one in an office goes to the fridge randomly looking for free food. And, remember to follow up the next day, if the leftovers are still there, toss them.
11. Every time you open the door to put something in, say to yourself, “Did I leave something else here yesterday?”
12. Finally, if you see the fridge looking overpacked or smelling like a landfill, how about you take a turn at walking the “refrigerator beat”?

Faithfully submitted,

Your Refrigerator Police Chief

Do you agree, disagree, or have any to add? Leave your comment below.