Skip to main content
Clear icon
11º

What NOT to name your boat

Are these names funny or lame? You tell us!

Pexels photo

Summer has officially arrived, which means time spent out on the water, and, if you're lucky enough, perhaps in a boat.

It seems like as long as boats have been around, owners have been naming them: sometimes after people, sometimes to get a laugh -- boat puns, anyone? -- and sometimes, it seems, at random.

Recommended Videos



Walking around any harbor or boat club, it's kind of fun to read the names. People can be clever and groan-inducing all at the same time.

With that in mind, we scoured the internet to find some of the worst boat names we could find.

We apologize in advance if yours is on this list! Of course, what some might find silly, other people might find hilarious. So take this list with a grain of salt. And if you’re naming your boat: Steer clear of the following.

Can you tell we’re targeting puns?

  • Tip-Sea
  • Bow Down
  • Sexual Heeling
  • Ahoy Vey
  • Yacht Sea
  • _______'s Tuition  (for example: Robert's Tuition)
  • Biopsea  (Is this your way of telling us you're a doctor?)
  • Vitamin Sea
  • Row vs. Wade
  • Now Who’s the Loser, Dad?  (Yikes).
  • Usain Boat
  • The Codfather
  • Seas the Day
  • Liquid Asset
  • Fishizzle  (Snoop Dogg would approve).
  • Tax Sea-vation
  • She Got the House  (Sorry about the divorce, friend).
  • Better Knot
  • Buoys in the Hood
  • Feelin’ Nauti
  • Breaking Wind
  • Are We Having Fun Yet?
  • Knotty Buoy
  • Ship For Brains
  • Sea Nile
  • Yeah Buoy

h/t to the following sites for inspiration, ideas and comments from readers: World Wide Interweb, Messing About in Boats, Sailing Anarchy and The Hull Truth.


[ READ NEXT: Want to be happier overall? Yale has a class for that -- and it's available online, for free | Woman falls asleep on plane, wakes up 'all alone' on 'cold, dark' aircraft | We asked, you answered: All the baby products, parenting advice that made you LOL ]


Just a heads-up: Only click through to those sites, linked above, if you’re OK with some sexual innuendo and explicit language.